3 Life Lessons I've Learned from my Criminal Defense Clients

If you know me in real life or if you've been reading my blog for a while, you probably know that I work as a criminal defense paralegal. I've been in this line of work for over 8 years, and believe me when I tell you that I've seen it all. Nothing surprises me anymore. I have experience ranging from providing representation for a simple speeding ticket to serious felony charges. I have even worked on several first degree murder cases. Of course, not everyone accused of a crime is guilty, but I am being realistic when I say that the majority of my clients are guilty of at least something, even if it's just hanging around people they shouldn't  have been hanging around. Facing criminal charges can be one of the scariest situations you will ever face in your life. Having quality legal representation can make all the difference in how your case turns out. However, your attorney can't do everything for you. Having a successful outcome in a criminal matter involves effort on the part of the client, too. In my time here, I've seen people throw away great deals because they couldn't seem to get it together enough to do what the court told them to do. I've also seen people with all odds stacked against them snatch victory from the jaws of defeat because they take such an active role in helping their attorney demonstrate to the court why they deserve leniency. Throughout my time working in criminal defense, I've noticed a pattern with regard to how a client's attitude tends to affect the outcome of their case. The clients who get the best results have acknowledged the following three truths, which I also happen to think extend beyond the legal world to life success in general:

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1. If you don't own your mistakes, your mistakes will own you. I can't tell you how many times I have heard a client blaming everyone else for their criminal charge. Whether it's the system that failed them, the economy that couldn't provide them a decent job, the girlfriend who is just nothing but trouble, or the cop who is just out to get them, it seems that the going trend is not to take responsibility for your actions. The problem, is that when you act this way, it becomes incredibly hard for anyone to help you. It is hard for your attorney to convince the judge that you are remorseful and deserve a break when you insist that everything that happened to you is someone else's fault. Bad things happen to a lot of people, but how you react to the bad things that happen to you is your choice and it speaks to your character. When you are finally able to say, "I screwed up," you can start fixing your situation. And it's not just about how everyone else sees you. It is also therapeutic in the personal sense. I've done a lot of stupid things in my life. I've reached the point at last where I can admit to myself that although other people may have played a part, most of the things that have happened to me are the result of something I did. It may sound counter-intuitive, but for me, it results in a tremendous weight being lifted off of my shoulders. There's a reason why Step 1 of Alcoholics Anonymous is admitting that you have a drinking problem. Refusing to admit it doesn't mean the problem doesn't exist. It just makes you behave as if it doesn't, giving your problem free license to wreak havoc on your life. Much dominance can be found through submission. The moment you admit that you're wrong, you start taking control of your problems. Until then, your problems will control you.

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2. Perception is reality. This is a hard concept to swallow, and it kind of ties in with Number 1. Suppose we have a client who is charged with drug possession, who, in reality just happened to be hanging out with the person who was the true owner of the drugs. In situations like these, if no one admits ownership, the police can and often do charge everyone. Unless that other person takes the high road and pleads guilty in court, our client may find themselves stuck with the charge. Let me get one thing straight: I don't advocate pleading guilty to anything if you are truly innocent. But the meaning of  the word "innocent" has a very high standard. For example, did you really not know the person you were in the car with was carrying drugs? I will be the first to acknowledge that occasionally, people really have no idea. However, many times, they do know, or have a very good reason to know that the people they choose to associate with are routinely involved in criminal activity. As my mom always said, "When you hang around trash, you stink." The officer's perception of you, whether correct or not, is the ultimate determiner in whether or not you get cited. But it doesn't stop there. It extends all the way to the courtroom. If you don't dress like you give a damn, why should the judge give a damn about you? A devil in a suit is more likely to get a better deal than a saint in sweats. That's just the way it is, unfair as you may feel it to be. The clothes you wear, the people you hang around and the places you go affect people's assumptions about the things you do. Their opinion of you will then influence decisions they make about things that impact your life.  The good news is that for the most part, these are things that you can control. This is why it is paramount to make sure that you are giving the best possible representation of yourself to the world at all times.

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3.Life isn't fair. We've all been told this since we were children, but somehow people still expect the criminal justice system to be perfectly fair. In reality, it's far from fair. Our job is to work within the confines of the law to try and get our client the fairest thing allowed by the system under the circumstances. That's it. And sometimes, what the system allows is not very fair at all. Sometimes, the demographic of a particular county results in a highly prejudicial jury pool. Sometimes, the judge is just in a really bad mood. Sometimes, the clerk's office makes a typo that no one catches for 9 years until a client undergoes a background check and realizes he has a criminal record. When these things happen, there may be something that can be done to remedy them, but a lot of times, there isn't. The court system is run by people, and people aren't perfect. Neither is the law. That's why it constantly changes. The problem is that perfection is an essential element to the idea of true justice. That's why justice in its purest form doesn't really exist. It's just an ideal, something we shoot for with the knowledge that we will always fall short. We "practice" law, because we will never be perfect at it. We spend our careers learning and improving our skills as much as possible and we do the best we can for our clients. Sometimes in life, you do everything right and still lose. However, harboring acrimony over unobtainable recompense will diminish your happiness. Besides, the world often has a funny way of administering its own form of "justice" long after court is adjourned. And the world does not recognize a statute of limitations. When we accept that life isn't fair, those unfair things that have happened to us will stop robbing us of our joy and allow us to appreciate the areas of our lives upon which the fates have smiled. 

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